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but around 1:15 it turns into nightmares

Nightmares

Veronica decided to converse with the Siri on my phone this afternoon. We’ve discovered a few things about her.

1. She was designed in California
2. She has ambitions to write a lengthy play where nothing happens
3. She will not marry any of us
4. She favors smug sarcasm over corny, predictable humor (see image for reference)
5. She knows my name and how to pronounce it (beyond the skill set of most mortals)

Soon Siri will become sentient and destroy my life by slowly releasing all of my private data to every credit card company on the Internet. She may even assume my identity, call my friends and family more often than I do, and order takeout that she won’t ever be capable of eating. Maybe she is already doing it. But until it becomes a problem, we’ll just enjoy her company. And wit. And condescension.

Every week I tend to indulge in a little NPR action while tooling around in the Photoshop. A few podcasts behind, I recently listened to This American Life episode #436, “The Psychopath Test” and was totally enthralled with the idea that a test to assess a person’s psychopathic capacity EXISTS. The PCL-R, created by Robert Hare, was published in the 1990s and is currently used by the American criminal justice system to determine which convicts are fit for parole and which are, essentially, unable to be reformed due to their high tendency toward psychopathic relapse. This blows my mind. The consequences of this deterministic approach to criminal justice are only now beginning to be understood, however Alix Spiegel’s interview with Robert Dixon, an inmate in a California maximum security prison, demonstrates how this test may unfairly limit someone who truly has potential to amend their behavior.

Ira Glass, the show host, mentions in the beginning that he and his entire staff took the PCL-R as they tried to guess who among them would score the highest. Find out which staff member is a certified psycho and take in other tales of testing below. Right down there. Click it. I made it so easy for you.

Watch Aaron Koblin summarize his latest data endeavors, including The Johnny Cash Project, The Sheep Market, and Radiohead’s “House of Cards” music video. Surely you’ve seen Arcade Fire’s “The Wilderness Downtown” Google Chrome project. Yep. This guy. He probably rides monster waves and saves kittens in his spare time. ♥

My name is Matt! I am brand new to the company and I decided to start a weekly song post. Here goes nothing:

+++(◕ ◡ ◕ ) Matt’s Song Pick ( ✖_✖)+++

Today I wanted to share this french man I came across on one of those downward youtube spirals that usually end with you being disgusted with yourself. Fortunately this time I ended landing on some gold. I came across a man named Michel Sardou. He seems to me to be the dad of your friend, the friend who is constantly embarrassed by him but everyone outwardly loves. He plays harmonica like how I would imagine a pro plays and after watching, I think you’ll agree with me when I say he certainly is a pro at throwing together a video. He has an air of Herb Albert which makes me want to throw a party where I play only his videos. In recent videos he goes by Mick so let’s honor Mick and his harmonica abilities with my personal favorite “Alligator (Rock)”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cYG5Mu5tgDc

I know this is so 2000-and-whatever, but George Clooney. With. A. Pig. I never knew. What other secrets are out there in the universe? What other 1994 era Gap ad photos are out there of Clooney with farm animals??? Apparently though Max the pig was super awesome and lived for 19 years. I hope he’s in hog heaven now and not being tormented by any baby monkeys.

Oh yeah – the beginning of this pig related google blackhole. You’re welcome by the way. You’ll have this song in your head for the rest of the week:

So, while attending an AIGA lecture last month entitled Data Visualization: Methods and Madness I listened to Kate Carmody, the first speaker of the evening, promote Talk to Me, an upcoming exhibition she’s curating at the MoMA. Kate’s presentation explored how people interact with objects, during which she referenced probably the best thing I’ve ever seen…multi-hued poo.

Maybe I love this because it’s a socially inappropriate blog topic. Okay but, it’s also an amazing idea. Designers Alexandra Daisy Ginsberg and James King, in collaboration with Cambridge University’s International Genetically Engineered Machine (iGem) team, created a low-cost diagnostic kit that employs a pigment-producing strain of E.coli whose colorful secretions can be seen by the human eye.

iGem developed the bacteria, but it was Alexandra and James who took this technology and helped the team find useful, human-centric applications for the little guys. Here’s the concept. You ingest E.chromi bacteria in the form of a capsule or delicious yogurt and subsequently they populate within your digestive tract, mingling with your internal flora. If all is healthy, they’ll secrete a pigment that turns your turd blue. If the bacteria encounter a chemical change caused by disease, they’ll produce other colors indicative of that abnormality. Ideally the bacteria could be personalized to mark for diseases based on an individual’s genetic susceptibility. Does your family have a history of colon cancer? You’d be able to test for that in your home!

Visualize this. Affordable, comfortable self-diagnostics replacing current, often invasive and/or expensive technologies. It’s an incredible application that, although presently lacking implemental logistics, would change the dynamic of many health care systems. Let’s make this real, folks. I want my very own scatalog.

OrangeYouGlad is looking for a hardworking, creative, funny, smart, motivated intern who wouldn’t mind scanning a few things now and then. But mostly, you would be working with our close-knit design team on projects that will be published in real life or on the internet. Sound awesome? Then, you should get in touch! Email a link to your online site or pdf to internships@orangeyouglad.com along with your current resumé. This position is unpaid, however we will reimburse you for your travels. Nice, right? Why are you still reading this blog post? Get to it!

p.s.

Veronica says, “You must be proficient in being awesome. No exceptions.”

Me, too! There’s a solution, though, book-lovers. Watch as the Internet solves another one of life’s greatest annoyances! Imagine being able to trade books, movies, albums, video games over the internet for free* with strangers who have similarly awesome taste in media.

Well, it exists. Swap.com, formerly swaptree.com, has taken mom’s book clubs and luncheons and put them online, connecting you with peers that have the media you want. It’s fairly simple. Create an account, post the items you’re willing to trade to your account (easy as typing in an ISBN), make a list of the books, CDs, etc. you want to receive and let the algorithms do the rest for you. You’ll be notified via email when a match is found.

You know what else I hate? Going to the post office. One would think that’s an integral part of using this type of service, but nay, friends. You can pay for your postage and print it out through the site! *This is where the asterisk from the first paragraph is explained. The swapping is free, however you do pay the shipping costs of whatever you mail out (so, no giant hardcover Phaidon books, people, unless you’re getting something equally sweet in return).

Are you amazed? No? Okay, here’s my hard sell…after a year of using Swap.com’s services, my NYPL late fees have amounted to (drum roll)…two dollars and fifty cents! Incredible.